May Your Memories Linger

Time, love
Time, love
Time, love,
It’s only a change of time.

These are the lyrics to a Josh Ritter song that came to mind as I gazed at a photo from 5 years ago.

A photo of myself and members of the Brown family gathered outside a favorite breakfast joint in Arkansas. We had just learned more about the brain cancer that had become part of our daily conversation in 2019. The photo now also contained the heading . . . “On this day, 5 years ago.”

How could this be?

On this same date in 2024 I helped with a race sponsored by an organization that had placed signs with the phrase, “Live Like Josh.” This foundation was started by friends of another Josh who passed away too early. This foundation and group of friends now helps carry on his legacy in various ways.

At the event, someone asked me what my necklace meant and I spent time sharing about my late husband and about what had just begun to unravel 5 years prior. Her words caused me pause, "I had no idea you were a widow."

Yet again on this same day, I recall that my grandfather Reese said his final goodbyes to this world in 2015.

The day. May 4th.

What a funny medley of occasions. I use medley even as the word feels a bit too cheerful for all of these facts. Yet the experiences of all these people and places does turn into quite the symphony of thoughts and feelings. A song that points to another word for this day.

Hope. A hope that maybe someday all the parts will sound glorious in a whole new and unexpected way. That the joys and sorrows of a single day will no longer seems as dramatic.

In the moment, evaluating all the pieces I think, “How can this be my life?” Yet it is and only option I have is to keep walking through the next day. Finding hope in the midst of heartache, finding joy in the moments big and small, and recognizing other people who also feel sorrow and joy maybe even on the same day.

If I were to borrow the phrase “Live Like Josh” for my own beloved Josh I know he would once again remind us all that no matter what God is still good and that our hope is much more than what we see.

May the memories also linger even when they almost feel awkward.

And may the force of God be with you for he offers hope for moments of great delight and despair.

p.s.
Below is also an older video from our time in Nevada when Josh preached about hope (and the Goonies). It's one of my favorite ones that a friend from Virginia recently reminded me about.

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